The day before I flew back to Oklahoma, Ezekiel opened his eyes for the first time in a week and looked at me breifly. Kirk said, "Mom, that was a gift from God!" Just a few days before, we all (including the head doctors) thought we were going to lose the little guy due to infection from the meconium and pulmonary hypertension. I called Bill and he sent an urgent request for prayer via email. We immediately received return emails from friends at home, Japan, Kenya, Korea Grand Cayman, and India! Everyone assured us of their prayers.
Christian doctors at Loma Linda Children's Hospital were confused and began to pray for wisdom. After deciding to try a different antibiotic, Ezekiel showed signs of improvement. Tamra, being a nurse, taught me how to interpret the numbers on the various machines. In spite of wanting to have the heart of Abraham when he was asked to give up his son, I couldn't contain my tears of joy when I saw my tiny grandson open his eyes.
I was touched when Kirk told me how much he had learned about God the past few weeks. He said, "I can't hold my son because of all the wires and tubes. God wants to hold me, but it is impossible when I'm so attached to this world. Everyday, I tell Ezekiel what a beautiful room he has at home that it is just waiting for him. Someday, I'm going to leave this sin-sick world behind and go to a beautiful home that has been prepared for me!"
While attending Kirk's church (Set Free) last Sunday morning, I was reminded that our words come back to us. A man named Mark came up to me. He said, "Ten years ago I came to Kirk's church when he was in Pomona. You talked to me for a long time and encouraged me to go to the Ranch and get rid of my drug habit. I didn't realize that God's strength is greater than mine. Here I am 10 years later, and still drug free! I wanted to say, "Thank you!" To be honest, I didn't remember the man and was stunned! Mark also went on to tell me about his daughter who was born with heart problems and is now 30 years old. Now, he was encouraging me!
Kirk called last night. He was allowed to hold his first child for the first time! I told Kirk to call me when they get those respirators out of the baby's mouth and he can cry. What a beautiful sound!
When you love someone so much, and the doctors admit that they aren't sure what to do, it is such a comfort to be able to cry out to God. It is also a comfort to have family and friends that say, "I can't help, but I have a God that can!" My faith has been strengthened through this time. I have also learned that if God wanted to take my grandson back to heaven, He would give me the grace and strength to deal with that also.
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