Friday, May 1, 2009

May Day makes me think of when I was in the second grade. I attended Lakeside Elementary School in San Diego, California. I can still hear the record player over the loud speaker as we danced on the playground. The balls had been removed from tetherball poles and replaced with colored ribbons. We danced until the ribbons had been woven closely onto each pole. I loved it!

Spring comes every year in such an orderly fashion. Either there is an intelligent creator, or it's possible that watch parts could accidentally come together and form a beautiful piece that tells time. Sound ridiculous???

Thursday, I woke up early so that I could pick Mom up and drive her to the airport in OKC by 8:00 AM. --- and still teach my class which begins at 9:00 AM. I wished that I could have flown to California with her for the graduations, wedding, and to welcome Crystal's new baby. Tamra called yesterday to say "thank you" for the gold heart necklace. She was pinned today in a special ceremony. She is officially an R.N. with a B.S. Degree. I am blessed to have such a smart and sweet daughter-in-law!

I talked to my cousin, Teri, at the pool this week. Her mother, MaryAnn, was one of my best friends before she died of cancer. She had helped me to decorate my bedrooms with blue and white motifs. I still really miss her! It's so hard for me to let go of people I love!

Noel is not doing so well. He went to St. John's ER again this week. He might have to have a different type of pacemaker inserted into his chest. He's only 55 yrs. old. We are planning to go to Springfield the first weekend of June. Rosslyn Academy, the school where we taught in Kenya, is having a USA reunion in Springfield. We hope to see many former students and teachers.

This morning, I was trying to think why someone who once believed in God would stop. I thought of the following reasons: 1) feeling that one's failure is too great to be forgiven 2) extremely poor role models of faith 3) a sense of pride and importance that equals self-worship 4) a sensitivity to punishment and reward due to abuse 5) an inability to trust God to judge fairly 6) it's much easier to be "cool and popular" in a secular world 7) the inability to love one's self -therefore "God could never love me".

Number Seven was my problem for years. At last, I have learned to trust God to love me, so that I can love myself and others!