Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Who Needs to Be Off the Hook?

When I was 13 years old, I delivered the San Diego Union newspaper every morning at 6:00 AM. It was against the company policy to let a girl deliver papers at that time. However, my two older brothers had been outstanding employees and the Union didn't want to lose our family. As a result, they let me share the route with Galen until he turned 12 years old. It was dark, and the police checked on me frequently. One morning, I obediently put the paper on the customer's porch and then cut across their yard to where my Flexi awaited with the rest of the papers. We lived in a new suburban neighborhood where everyone had immaculate lawns. Because of the darkness, I didn't notice that this yard had just been re-sodded! I was horrified when I felt my feet sinking into the new top soil. I finished my route and then headed back to that house. I knocked on the door and waited with tears rolling down my cheeks. The man who answered was so kind! He thanked me for being honest, assured me it could be fixed, and gave me a $5 tip for making sure his paper was on his porch each morning. I've never forgotten that experience. Whether I make stupid mistakes on purpose or unknowingly, God is always there and ready to forgive me. It feels soooo good to come clean and be forgiven!! God doesn't need to get off the hook. I DO! I'm the one who messes up! I mess up because I can't always see the larger picture. I am just human and finite. God knows that! I can relax because He isn't judging me, and I don't have to judge anyone else. I can forgive myself. If I can't love myself, I can't love anyone else.